F. my life. It's football season and I'm on a diet...

So football started this weekend... That means 2 things... 1. I'm super super SUPER pumped to watch the Giants kill it on the field.... and 2. FATTENING FOOOOOOD. HOLLER.... but fucccck me. I'm on a diet... All the wings, the beers, the fries, the mozz sticks, pizza... I can't eat that shit anymore. And as much as I want to cave.. I just can't --- I need help friends.... I'm DYING here... it's only been the first week and I already want to house a whole pizza and 2 dozen wings from Wing It. What the hell am I going to do? OH, and don't forget the TAILGATING when I go to games!! WHAT am I going to say? No, please don't shove that amazing flank steak in my mouth, I'm on a diet, pass me the fat free crackers please????? Fuck.

I totally read up on some "healthy football snacks" and yeah, I'm sure that I will try them out, but dudes, that's still not going to replace the yummy goodness of grease filled food on Sundays... What to do, what to do -- maybe I will just start sleeping through Sundays so that I won't have to deal with sitting at a table at our local Buffalo Wing Factory watching all my friends sip their delish cold dollar beers and house wings and fries.... perhaps. But that would suck. hahahaha... Or do I work out super hard during the week so come Sunday, the only thing in my stomach is coors light and buffalo wing pizza? WHAT TO DO, WHAT TO DO. This is seriously such a dilema...

In the meantime, I am going to use this week to figure out what to do come Sunday... Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated, because I'm not exactly sure I can make it through this whole season without at least a few weekends of binge eating. Football, my friends, is NOT fat kid diet friendly.

WHAT DO I DO????????
Fat kid out.

ps. I hope you realize from all my cursing that I am really passionate about this issue... HELP!

me in my happy fat football days... in my hands, a foot long and a nice ice cold beer.

beer bongs??? kiss them good-bye... :(