8 weeks down, a lifetime to go....

Looks like I'm going to have to keep writing this blog people, because clearly, my job is FAR from over.

The big question is why...? Why??? BECAUSE. I DONT WANT TO LOOK LIKE THIS ANYMORE! (see right below)

Our 8 week CRANK class has now come to and end... and as I sit here and look back on when I started this whole thing, and not even just 8 weeks ago, but like from the beginning of this blog.. I look at the fact that I did 4 week cleanses, or I did a WEEK of working out, but today, I can say, I watched what I ate, and I worked out for 8 weeks straight. Besides playing sports in school, that's the longest I've gone, post college, that I have ever been in a gym, and I'm not stopping. What's Next? 8 weeks of bootcamp. So in 8 more weeks I'll be writing talking about how I made it thru 16 WEEKS of working out... and so on, and so on. I think a lot of it has to do with the people I work out with at RTB, and my friends who graciously sit here and read my horrible writing, and listen to me bitch and complain, but still send me those supportive text's, or facebooks, or emails.... It's YOU guys, and a little bit of dedication on my part, that has gotten me through the beginning (and I believe hardest) part of this journey.

The hardest part for me has always been getting over that 2 week hump - finding time to get to the gym, and finding a place where I'm happy and I feel comfortable.... but I've learned, if you want to meet your goals (and unfortunately, mine take a lot more work then most) you have to make it part of your life. Make it a priority, and make it one of those things you just have to do everyday... I used to just, eat, work, sleep, hangout... now, eat, sleep, work, WORKOUT... It obviously sucks... because I don't have the time that I used to have for my friends, or for Juan..... just last night he was telling me how he's happy for me, but he misses me, and misses that we don't hang out as much.. and that hurts. It's the hardest part of this whole thing... trying to better yourself, without hurting the ones you love. Especially for me I think, because i'm not just trying to lose the weight so that I'm healthy and skinny for everyday life.. but I'm newly engaged, and am trying to meet specific goals for my wedding, so it's like, one, I'm doing this for me, for our day, but two, it's hurting my relationship. Unfortunately, I can't force anyone to come workout with me, Juan and I from day 1 have had different ways of dropping pounds, and we are pretty much stuck to our ways.. .he does his thing, I do mine. Thats just the way the cookie crumbles my friends... and it sucks. It's not that he doesn't support me, that's not true in any way, it's just hard, and I understand that.

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Last night I met with Brian (the owner of RTB) and we talked about diet and nutrition - and we are going to be taking it to a level that I haven't taken it before. Well, actually, I retract that... the "detox" I used to do, is a lot similar to what my diet will be from here on out, but I think it's going to be harder this time. I really learned what I should and should NOT be eating... because it's so hard for women's bodies to lose the weight, since we were built to have some chub and be baby makers, there are tons of things that we think are OK for our body, that really aren't. And last night, I learned a lot about it... And like Brian said, this isn't a "diet" this is changing your eating habits to give you a healthy life. And I believe that. I think the problem with a lot of these quick loss weight loss programs is that you do them for a year or so but you aren't training yourself how to eat healthy for life... you are training yourself how to be healthy for your immediate goals... I really have a much better sense now on what this banana is doing to my body instead of just, I'm going to eat it since it's a fruit. It's really pretty cool.

What does this mean though? It means again, less socializing, more working out and eating right. If I am going to achieve such radical goals in one year, this is what is going to have to happen... and hopefully my friends won't get pissed, and won't be upset with me, but instead, will go on a bike ride, or take a boot camp class with me... but see that I need to do this, I can't step off track by going to the bar one night and skipping the gym... that this is my life right now, and hopefully you will be there with me along the road... Does this sound selfish of me? Of course... but honestly, I've been a good friend, for a long time, and I was always the YES girl, YES I'll go drink, YES I'll party all night, YES I'll eat that whole cheese PIZZA ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! haha... But I can't do that anymore.. plain and simple... And stop making me trying to eat a whole cheese pizza when I'm drunk, I won't do it! HAHAHAHA..

This doesn't mean I'm going to be lame, shit ass boring, Andrea... I'm still planning on going on my trips, I'm still planning on going out and such - but I'm just changing some of the habits that I had in the past, to reach my goal in the future.

SO AFTER ALL THIS - AFTER 8 WEEKS - I know it might not sound huge to you guys, but I lost over 12 inches on my body - 4 1/2 in my bust, and 4 1/2 in my waist to point out the big ones... and 10 pounds! A normal, healthy weight loss is a pound a week, and yeah, that sounds like not a ton, but it's healthy weight off that I will keep off!

I couldn't be happier... (well, I could, not thinking about everything I'm about to give up as far as FOOD YUM YUM FOOOOOOOD) but, really... I say this again, I couldn't have done this without you guys... without the trainers at RTB, without Juan... and this is only the beginning!

I also think about the things I COULDN'T do in the past, and the things I want to do...

• I couldn't wear a north face jacket unless it was dudes, because a womens didn't fit me. 
• I couldn't wear sweet ass snowboarding gear bc again, the women's stuff didn't fit me... 
• I couldn't fit into a blazer because it wouldn't fit around my sides and button -- (my arms are still an issue, but I'm sure those will start shrinking soon as well) 
• I couldn't shop at awesome stores like GAP/AE/ATL without shopping online in their "Large Sizes"
• I couldn't fit into most XL Nike workout pants... 
• I couldn't even really fit comfortably in a plane seat...

All these things are now I CAN'S... we are getting there, slowly but surely... but I'm about to buy my first North Face winter jacket, and some new snowboarding gear that isn't MENS for this upcoming season... I love being able to say, finally... I can get this stuff... And eventually I will have all the problems skinny people have with shopping and such - more problems like - I can't find this in my color, or this might be too big, can I get a smaller size, or even, these are too small, can I get a larger size! Because up till now, I've ALWAYS BEEN THE LARGEST SIZE! haha

So, after all that, I leave you with this today... THANK YOU. If you are reading this, I have to THANK YOU... and because if I can finally do it... ANYONE can do it...

Well, I'll leave you this as well -
From our friends at Dashing Dish:

Carmel Apple Pie Protein Shake!!!!!! Yum.
Ingredients

1/2 cup	Fat free cottage cheese 1
1	Scoop vanilla protein powder 2
1/2 cup	Apple chopped fine, or 1/2 cup applesauce
1/2 tsp	Caramel extract (or 2 tbs sugar free butterscotch pudding mix)
1/2 tsp	Apple or pumpkin pie spice
Dash	Cinnamon
5-10	Ice cubes (Depending on how thick you like it, use less for a thinner consistency)
1/2-1 cup	Water (Alter this according to desired consistency)
Optional:	1/2 tsp xanthan gum 3, 1/2 tsp butter extract

¹ Cottage cheese may sound strange, but TRUST me… this is what makes the ‘MILKSHAKE’ consistency! Also, if you are sensitive to dairy, you can use tofu to get the same consistency!

² I use Designer Whey Protein powder. (I WOULD SUBSTITUTE THIS WITH Vitol Egg White Protein Ice Cream Vanilla -- 12 oz (LINK HERE)) It has 100 calories per scoop. I buy the vanilla flavor because it’s a good base to add whatever flavors you want to make. It is also all natural. You can buy it from Kroger, GNC, Trader Joe’s, Amazon, or Netrition.com.

³ You can get xanthan gum from most grocery stores in the gluten free section! Just a pinch of it makes your shake so thick and creamy!

Nutrition Breakdown

1	Serving
213	Calories per Shake
0 g	Fat
16 g	Carbohydrate
2 g	Fiber
10 g	Sugar
36 g	Protein
5	WWP+*

WORDS TO LIVE BY:

A tad bit emotional this morning.

Do you ever wake up thinking, life would be so much better if..... Well I do... my if, is if I was skinnier. Do you know how much easier life would be? Clothes would fit better, I would feel better about myself, I wouldn't feel uncomfortable walking around in life looking the way I do... I know, I know, I preach about everyone is beautiful, of course, and I know I am, but man, do you know how much easier it would be if I was a size 10 instead of a size 18? Do you know how much better I would feel being able to go into a clothing store saying, ahhh, I will find something today, instead of, I hope this stores largest size fits me? Do you know how HARD it is to lose weight?

I get so down on myself because I see Juan, and all he has to do is only eat a sandwich a day for a month and he's lost 30lbs. I mean, A) That's not healthy, B) I love food and I get hungry even talking about food so that would never work and C) I'm jealous. I am so jealous that that's all he has to do. For me, I have to wake up at 4am, get ready for work, have a meal replacement shake, work till 3, get home at 5, have another shake, workout for 2 hours, and then get home just to come to bed. So basically, for me to lose weight, I have to not have a life. Now, I feel like I'm being a big whiner right now, maybe I am, but at the same time, I like working out now so I don't mind doing this, but when I have no friends left because I can never hang out because I'm at the gym, then I'm going to care.

This whole wedding thing has me down too - you know, you look at stylemepretty. com all day long and you never really see brides that are overweight. I don't want to be an overweight bride. My biggest fear is walking down that aisle with all the eyes on me, knowing that I've been on a strict diet and workout regiment for the past year, and then BAM, I'm still rocking my size 18 dress. It's not all about appearances, I know, it's about marrying my best friend, but at the same time, I can't help but think in the back of my head, ugh, I'm the biggest one here.

My guilty pleasure is reality TV and my guiltiest pleasure is probably all the different Real Housewives shows. On RHONJ, Lauren Manzo, has a difficult time losing weight. She's always talking about the same things I talk about, she doesn't want to be bigger and her brothers can eat anything in the world and still be skinny... well, I used to feel for her, and I was like, just work out and stick with it - you will find it will work for you... Well instead of that, I guess she got the lapband surgery. And she looks great now. I am so jealous, but at the same time pissed. Just like all these celebrities, they have the time and money to either work out with a personal trainer 9 hours a day to stay skinny or have a surgery like that. I'm jealous in that I don't have that time or money, but I'm also kind of pissed that someone I could relate to on TV just took the easy way out. You should be in the gym Lauren, you could have done it. I eat a lot and love food too.... Anyways, yeah, annoying....

Honestly, I don't know what the point of this blog today even was? TO bitch and complain about the fact that I hate that I'm overweight? And that it's taking a long time to drop it? I guess... But I can tell you one thing, I think the thing that has been getting me to get up and go to classes everyday to workout has been the people over at RTB, they really are great, they are motivating, and they really like doing what they do, and it makes me like what I do... Also, I'm strong. Under all these rolls, I actually have some big muscles under there... and going to class and feeling like I'm really kicking some ass, makes me feel good. I know I just need to keep telling myself that it will take time, and I will get there eventually, I'm impatient, and I want to be skinny tomorrow. By December, I want to be a size 12/14 so  when I'm trying on dresses, they aren't like, well, there really aren't a lot for you to try on because you are HUGE. I will be skinny. One day.

Anyways, life is what you make of it, and just be happy... you will get there.. (Yeah, I'm really talking to myself)

Day??? I lost count. And I hate CRANK.

Ahhhhhh so as most of you know I started this new workout program this week with my old trainer, and pretty bad ass chick if you ask me, Evie. This is her to the left. She's mean as SHIT. But she gets the job done. Anyways.... let me tell you, I'm only 2 days in, and I feel like SHIT... SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT. Let's see how many times I can fit SHIT into the post. But the good kind of shit. The sore kind of shit. Not that, ugh I can't do this, SHIT, but the damn, I'm so out of shape SHIT. But at the same time, I love feeling sore. It makes me feel like I'm actually doing something when I'm at the gym from like 7:30-9pm everyday.... UGH.

So this crank program. It's legit. It's over at the new gym Evie works at called, Raise the Bar Strength and Conditioning. Now, I'm not going to lie, when I walked in there, I was like SHIT, I do NOT belong here... everyone was fit like no other... They had cut arms, 24 packs of abs, and here I walk in with big flabby arms and abs I haven't seen in decades! I was super intimidated, let me tell you. But then I started meeting everyone and the good thing is, I didn't feel judged. I felt like I belonged. Everyone is there for the same reason, to drop some LBS, get in shape, or just get more and more fit. I even wore a sleeveless shirt to my first class, and that's HUGE. I always wear sleeves because I hate these flabby arms! The CRANK class consists of 4 workout classes a week working on weight lifting, either upper or lower body, and then 2 30 minute cardio sessions a week, and that's IT. I thought, oh I'm taking this CRANK class I'm going to have to be in the gym like 9 times a week and I won't have a life and all that SHIT, but nope.. it's pretty simple.. well minus the work outs - dudes, yesterday we had to run suicides in the parking lot, I haven't run suicides in ummmmm I don't know 10 years since I played basketball? HAHAHA ("I do suicides on the tourrrr busssss, I do suicides on the private jet, you know what that mean, that I'm fly to death" - thanks kanye) it sucked. HAHAHAHA.

Along with the workouts, Evie put together a meal plan for us. As you can see, we get to eat every 2 hours, but this will be my diet for the next 8 weeks... andddddd pretty sure I won't be boozing it up. Oh well... no pain no gain right?!?!?! It's pretty awesome... so I guess I am complaining but also pumped about all of this.. this is the first time I've wanted to work out daily... Let's just hope this all works out because I'm sick of looking like I have a baby-on-board when I wear a maxi dress! HAHAHAH

Here is one of the recipes that Evie gave us - it's great, you should all try it esp before a workout!


Chile Chicken & Basil
Ingredients

1 lb Chicken breast
2 Serrano Chiles
1 tsp Light soy sauce
2 cups fresh basil
1 Tbsp fish sauce
3 Garlic cloves


Preparation
Chop garlic and chilies finely, add a pinch of salt, use back of spoon to scrape, make into paste. Sauté` paste in oil add chopped chicken breast. Add soy sauce, fish sauce, cook until chicken is done. Add basil until wilted, season with black pepper. Enjoy with 1 cup brown rice.

Ok, that's it for now!
Thanks for listening!!!!!!